That’s right, I want to be a star. My wonderful self is meant to do something more than breeding. Don’t get me wrong, being pampered is great, but I want it all. I want to be known as an actor, model, and future star of the Puppy Bowl series. Bye, bye Kitties! I am going to be next year’s half time show. Next year’s Super Bowl won’t hold a candle to me. I just now have to get my foot in the door. The only outlet I can think of is reality TV.
I can’t do Survivor. I don’t do living in the wild. My manicurist would kill me. Amazing Race wouldn’t work for me either. Who would be my partner? Chances are I would go with my favorite Russian gal. But I can’t drive and she would have to do all the tasks. Project Runway? Out of the question! I’m full of talent, but not like one person I know. So my only choice right now is America’s Next Top Model. Only down side of it is that I would be put in the house with ten other female dogs. Granted I am a male but that doesn’t matter. Hopefully, they will be very ugly mutts. I would so totally win this one. But knowing the show this is how it would go down:
Tyra:” We are down to our Final two, Ugly and Muggles”
Ugly Dog: “Yea”
Me:“Whatever”
Tyra:“I remember when I first started out. On one of my first photo shoots was posing with little dogs. I saw this really cute one and I totally walked up to it and pet it.”
Me:”Who cares?”
Tyra:“So we have two different models for two different genres. One , Ugly, is so ugly he is so beautiful. I never cried so hard when I saw your swimsuit photo. The other, Muggles , you are so fierce. So who do we pick: the ugly one or the fierce one?. This is so hard for me. I love you both…
Tyra pull out Uglys picture.
Then I go to kick Ugly’s butt. Next I go over to Tyra and pull her ugly weave off.
OK, maybe Top Model not a good idea. There is always Cops. (Heaven forbid!)