November 12, 2008

Divine (Mis)Judgments, Part 1

Fellow patrons of the Burnt Toast Diner, I have some very important news.

I am bored.

...

What? That's not enough for you? I mean, I'm stuck here with nothing to do besides sleep (see picture at right) and Google relevant information on Pinehearst Company while superhot boss Nathan and his emo-cute brother go off to play hero or something, and I'm supposed to do something about it? Really now?

...

Oh, all right, fine. I suppose you're all busy having problems or something. In case you are, I shall now shine my beneficent light upon you and brighten your day.

You see, when I signed onto this blog, I saw all your lovely names to the right, and I couldn't help but form my own opinions about each of you. It's only natural. As time went on, however, I learned that many of them were wrong, and have since formed entirely new opinions. To make your little minds happier, I shall now my views, both old and new, on some of the more messed-up of you, as I see fit. Rejoice, munchkins, for now you learn the truth!



ADAM MONROE (RIP :( )

First impression: Pretentious social climber. Get out of my sight.


Current impression: Gorgeous pretentious social climber. Me likey. Ooh, and you're immortal too?! :D

Even-more-current impression: I thought you were immortal! :(



SYLAR

First impression: You are a very attractive man. We must go out for dinner sometime.

Current impression: You are a very pretty girl. We must go out shopping sometime.





NIKI/JESSICA/GINA/WHATEVER-THE-HELL SANDERS

First impression: Skank.

Current impression: Dead skank. Is it wrong to put a smiley in here? :)





MAYA HERRERA

First impression: Ah! Kill it with poison!

Current impression: You are the loveliest, sweetest girl in the world, and it brings a grin to my face every time I see your perfect, not-at-all-hideous smile, especially when I remember how much you must be suffering at my complimentary words. >:)


NATHAN PETRELLI

First impression: HOT.

Current impression: SO, SO VERY HOT. AND SO, SO VERY MINE.





Ooh, this whole "truth" thing is fun. Maybe I'll do it again sometime.

Stay tuned for more gorgeous opinions!

XOXO,
Tracy Strauss

2 patrons:

  1. NoOoOoOoOoOoO!!!!! Forgive me! I feel hatred steaming from your words! I never meant to compete with you! Curse my lovely exoticness!!!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm sure I was too hot for your hot list. Women love a family man.

    ReplyDelete

 
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