Sylar’s Bachelor!

I’m like, lookin’ for love in all the wrong places! That’s right everyone! Sexy Sylar is lookin’ for a new boy (or girl) toy! And like, what better way to do it than through a reality game show! Those things are like, the greatest things on TV, and they totally last! Look at Joe Millionaire!

So I’ve totally killed some girl dead who lives in a big cute house! I got brain juice everywhere, but I licked it clean and now the house is lookin’ super for all you hot contestants to move in to! All you sweet studs and luscious ladies come make yourself at home!

So let’s get to what I’m lookin’ for in this competition! The rules will be simple, simpler than counting to five (gosh that’s hard)! I’ll be issuing something called “challenges.” I know, big word, right? Well anyways, these silly things aren’t as jibberishy as they sound. You contestants will take on tasks that demonstrate qualities that I’d look for in a hot bod!

.The contestant that does the best job in each challenge will be immune from elimination. I’m not sure what that means, either, but I think that one word “immunity” is good, and that other word “elimination” is bad, right? We’ll assume so!

Seeing as how this is about Sylarz, I’ll be the one to choose immunity. Then, you jealous vixens will vote amongst yourself, to like, figure out who (that doesn’t have immunity) will be eliminated that week. Then, we get to do it all over again! Yay!

The only time it gets like, confusing or something is for the final two. Normally, only the people left in my sexy contest will be able to vote for elimination, but for the final two, all you eliminated hussies can vote! So don’t throw a hissy fit and stop followin’ cause you lost, cause you can still play a role in deciding who wins!

And then the winner, lol, well, they get me! But that’s not all! Since I have the super sweet ability to know how things work, I’ll install a power in the winner! Of course, like, they’ll probably end up gettin’ killed in the end and me taking that power too…OMG, did I say that out loud?! Oops! Anyways, that’s totally the prize!

Anyways, now that everyone knows what’s goin’ on, get settled in inside my pretty mansion! Get to know each other, have sexy pillow fights, kill a person or two! After you all get settled in, I’ll post the first challenge, and you’ll get to meet ME! Like, good luck everyone! I hope I get a sexy one in the sack! Toodles!