My Stalker/BF

So my stalker is now my boyfriend... I think. Even though I'm sure he stole my toe, I still tried to tell him that I was normal. He responded by calling me Lizard Girl in front of the entire class. That was awful. I left the class room, fully intending to jump off the side of the building for shock value. See how smart he felt then.

And then he came running out like he didn't know what he did. So I turned on the tears and tried the guilt trip. It works on Daddy.

He told me to shut up, like the hero does in some cliche teen movie. And you know what? I LOVE teen movies. And when you look at him, he kinda looks like a pretty boy hero.

And he can FLY! Like bio-dad. I always dreamed that we would have a bio-father daughter moment where he took me into the air. Since that never happened, and probably won't seeing as I don't think drinking and flying is a great idea, I can live that experience through my boyfriend. That's not like, weird or anything is it?

And so I let him kiss me. But you know what really got me? He tasted like waffles. And not just any waffles, the waffles of my hometown. Burnt Toast Diner waffles! I figured I could stick around if there was a chance that he could make some for me. A guy who can cook is really hot.

So I guess we're together now. I figure if he doesn't come up with the waffles or if he tries anything too weird I can always crash his car into a building or something.