omg SHUT UP i cant even think. my LEAVE ME ALONE ILL KILL YOU lack of brainz iz rly starting 2 get 2 me. im so wound up i cant even say lol, lol. oops i just loled lol. well mayb just those 1 times lol but thatz it! i had 2 take a break from my simon hunt 2 get sum fresh brainz! i mean sure ive had sum monkey brainz n sum kitty brainz n even sum suspected muslim terrorist brainz but I NEED A BRAINZ FIX those dont rly cut it i knead sum genuine heroes brainz!

unfortunately the hot dr mohindy is sporked 2 the ceiling at the moment so i dont haf such easy access 2 special peeps nemore. i am gonna haf 2 rely on my intution alone! n thatz not so good. but luckily my intution WUZ good 4 1 thing n that wuz random pop BRAINZ culture references!

so i pulled out my pop culture references notebook n started looking thru. i knew that VAMPIRIC VESTIBULES 1 of these peeps wud haf 2 have SUM pwr. and then i stumbled upon the 1. it wuz him! carl weathers! a guy that awsum had 2 have a pwr! hear u kin see 1 of his finest performances.

well i went 2 find him wear i new he BOLERO BRAIN BITER wud be. the set of his knew movie rocky 7 lolz! he wuz playing the roll of zombie apollo creed rezzed by milo ventimiglia who had bcome a priest so he cud rez zombie apollo!

newayz wen i met w/ carl i cud totally tell he wuz broken. so i proofed that i had a pwr by totally stickin my face in his hot tub I NEED SPECIALNESS OMG 4 a whole min 2 show that i cud breath underwtr! w/ my pwr proofed i cud totally axe wut his pwr wuz!

me!: hmmm. ur last name is weathers. i got it! u kin control the whether! totally awsum lolz!

The Man: Wow, good guess! I wonder where you got that idea, it was close! My actual power though, is predicting the weather!

me!: omg like a meteorologist or sumthing!

The Man: :chortles: Hahaha, that’s a good one, but wrong. More like an Indian.

me!: like mohindy?!

The Man: No, like Squanto.

me!: or pocahantas!

The Man: Uh, sure.

me!: so does that pwr rly u no do nething?

The Man: Hell yes it does! It makes me the perfect tornado chaser! In fact, I was up for the main role in Twister. Damn Bill Paxton. Everything he touches turns to gold! There was no way they were turning him down once he auditioned. Plus, his character doesn’t die, and I’m kind of type cast as “big black guy who gets killed off.”

me!: hmmm. i guess thats kinda a decent TERRIBLE BUT I NEED BRAINS pwr. good enuf!

i tore off carls skull n ate his brain. oh heaven! it wuz like a triple fudge banana split sunday! mmmm mmm so good! i had nvr had a brian so good. thank u carl. evn tho u haf a totally useless pwr u totally alleviated my brain fix! well that wuz fun lol. now bck 2 the simon hunt lolz! toodles!

  • I think you need some serious negative attention since your parents didn’t love you enough as a child.

    I will have to ponder this…

  • I agree with Svetlana, and I’m a professional (you should really consider a career in psychology Miss Smith).

    P.S. Mr. Sylar why couldn’t you eat Jeremy’s brain and gain his ability to be an incredibly annoying Jesus-freak?

  • I’m worried about myself, I am starting to understand your blogs. lol

  • I hope you’ve got your fix. We have a body to toss dirt upon!

  • Heh heh. At least Jeremiah didn’t lose any XP when he died.

    You should try eatin’ some brains on WoW!

    — Devil Bush

  • According to Primatech files, he also has galvanized nipples.