Happy Halloween from the Unloved Carnie

I really need to escape this place. It's Halloween and I'm forced to do manuel labor and bond over food as we worship the blueberry Waffle Gods. This isn't a carnival haven for people with abilities. It's like a roach hotel and once you get sucked in you can't get out. Although I had several chances to escape, Lydia always kept me grounded. But now that she's playing reindeer games with that emotional crack head Sylar, I might just not have anything to tie me down to the carnival.

The other day, Sylar thought he saw someone, and so did I. It was my water witch, the beautiful Blonde Goddess who was immune to my knife tricks. But once More Sylar stopped me from finding her. And you know why? Because he had to pull the oh -whoa-is - me I don't know who I am, and I think I shook a lot of hands and flew jets and look at me! I look like a mime! So Samuel shooed him off and sent the Water Witch away! Leaving me once more feeling like the red headed left handed step child.

So I've decided to escape the carnival once and for all. But in order to do that I needed a disguise which meant a trip to the local costume Shop. It wasn't easy sneaking away, with Lydia being Emo about her daughter Amanda and Samuel with his we are a loving family please eat my waffles spiel. While Sylar was crying like a bitchy little girl on PMS, and Samuel was out getting revenge on the backwoods cops that went all small town vigilante with a side of deliverance on poor Jeremy I decided to run into the city and visit the local costume shops.


My first Choice was to dress like Toad from the X-Men. But once I looked in the mirror I thought maybe I better try something else. Maybe it was the green mousse hair, the giant tongue or the ridiculous looking goggles. Why would he wear them anyways? Why am I running around looking like a sycophant Frogman?



My Second Choice was to dress like Darth Maul from Starwars. As I contemplated buying Princess Leia's Gold Bikini (in case the water witch is into Role-Play) I noticed a group of girls staring at me and giggling.

“Stop following me!” I snapped at the group of young girls trailing behind me. Normally I'm not opposed to woman following me, but in this case I found it disturbing. First of all they were teenage girls and some boys as well. Second of all, they were all Starwars fans wearing T-shirts of Darth Maul.

“But you look like the guy who played Darth Maul,” a blonde girl said as she stepped in front of the pack.

Geez, I wasn't even wearing the mask. I'll I had on was the robe and funky boots. “Yeah, because I'm wearing a costume,” I said spinning around and doing Darth Mauls signature spin.

“But we watched you throw those knives and you did the signature Darth Maul spin, we saw it!” She pointed her finger at me. “Can we just have your autograph, or you know take pictures or something?”

“You have me confused with somebody else; I’ve never been in a Starwars movie, let alone a movie at all! I just work at the carnival. Look if you leave me alone, I’ll give you some free passes for the Ferris wheel or something.”



So I decided not to go with the Darth Maul Costume. Instead I decided to go with being Snake Eyes from G.I. Joe. That way my face was covered, the water witch could still see my hot body and if any kids came over and bugged me I'd just swipe them with my sword and steal their candy. So Ms. Water Witch, since your in the business of helping others, why don’t you just come to the carnival and help me?






Edgar, the unloved Carnie.

An Invisible Man, Sleeping in...a Van?

I was really hoping that we could have stayed at our last location until we found the Carnival and then left with them, but things didn't turn out that way. Sadly, Claude and I have had to leave our last location though not because of Zombies or because of how scared I was after watching Paranormal Activity. Apparently our last landlord was even more skittish than I, when it comes to possible paranormal disturbances and he sent some local ghost chasers to our building to check it out. It would have been nice if he had told us this when he came and told Claude and I that he was sending us to the local motel for two nights and picking up the tab for everything. In the process of getting all our props and gear packed up "just in case" we wound up leaving food and- more importantly- beer in the fridge. While the motel had decent room service, their beer selection was not good and Claude insisted, after the "crap beer" he'd snagged way back when at Peter's flat, that he would never drink that kind of "rubbish" again. I believe he said that bathing with that particular beer was preferable to drinking it. So Claude went back for his beer. Normally, this would not have been a problem, even with investigators about, except for the fact that they'd put a thermal camera in our kitchen. Of all the rooms to put thermal cameras in, I, personally, would not have picked our former kitchen. The only invisible presence there was Claude. Now me, I would have put a thermal camera in the main bedroom or in the "closet" that Claude had used as a bedroom. While invisible to the unaided eye, Claude showed up clearly on the investigators' thermal camera. You should have seen the colors he turned when our landlord collected us from the motel and told us that our kitchen was haunted and then he showed us the video "proof." Claude made the excuse that I couldn't sleep in a place that was haunted and went on to say that we'd be moving on as a result. I won't tell you what Claude said once the landlord was out of earshot. I really wish I could have seen this coming but all the readings I had been doing for clients left me no time or energy to read for myself or even for Claude.

After all the trouble we've had with stationary buildings and what not, Claude figured we should get some kind of mobile home but not something too big. RV's were out mainly because of how limited parking spaces for one are and we couldn't find one reasonably priced that wasn't a "stick." Neither one of us can drive anything that isn't automatic and Claude hates driving on the wrong side of the road etc. Then we got lucky and found this hippie type van. Sure it was old and Claude hated the paint job but the previous owners took really good care of it and it even has a small but comfortable living area and the built in fridge was a definite plus. Given that the Carnival we are seeking moves around a lot, I'm thinking that having our own van should be a plus. Of course Claude just had to call Maaco to repaint the van, because not only did he not like the paint job but he also didn't want to be mistaken for the van's former owners. While I look like one of the former owners I don't really think Claude does. I'm sure this was a major factor in his decision to repaint as was the fact that the painters offered to raise the roof for free. See what you folks think:




Personally, while I do resemble Velma, I don't really think Claude looks like Shaggy. Shaggy is kinda cute and all, but I much prefer Claude. Claude figures, with the new, white, and rather plain repaint job, that once we find the Carnival, we can just add their logo. I really would have preferred a Celestial pattern, or maybe even red and black but Claude insisted on just plain white. On the plus side, at least he didn't tell the contractors to modify the inside, beyond raising the roof a bit. He actually really liked the interior especially the built in fridge. Now, we're on the road again but at least we have our own wheels. All we really need to find at the moment is decent parking spaces until we can find the Carnival.

The Slaughter House Rules

Do you know that thing I said about how Becky Taylor is evil? Well, I was totally proven right. Not only is she evil, she's some sort of invisible, deadly evil. I mean, she - Let me start from the beginning.

The crazy Psi Alpha Chi girls came after us in the middle of the night and Claire went all La Femme Nikita on them and I think she maybe just about killed someone with kung fu. Becky was heading up this sorority sanctioned kidnapping, unsurprisingly. She took off her hood so Claire would back off. "Like, ohmigawd," Claire exclaimed, "I was just trying to defend my BFF! Duh! And what is with your gawd awful hideous outfits anyway?" That's when the girls put hoods over our heads, taped us up, and threw us into the trunk of a car. I'm sure there was some sort of camera back there, filming us for YouTube or something crass like that.

Our uncreative captors relocated Claire and I, as well as two other apparent prospective pledges, to some abandoned slaughterhouse. You'd think it was Halloween or something like that. I was having none of it. I mean, how lame was all of that? Totally, that's how lame it was. Completely and utterly. I could tell Claire was kind of on edge, so I was playing it cool for her. I mean, Becky was up to something - probably no good - but I couldn't let Claire sit and obsess about it. Even if the look she has on her face when she's stressed is totally adorable. Then again, she always seems to be stressed out. Must be why I think she's so cute. Anyway, to help Claire keep her cool, I let her play Twenty Questions with me about my love life. Did you know she's still got her V Card? I think that's so precious. But just as things started to get juicy, Claire was just about jumping out of her skin! "Like, did you see that?! It was totally, like, some sort of moving shadow thingy!" I figured she was trying to change the subject - you know how flakey cheerleaders can be. She was crazy insistent, though, that something was going on. I wasn't sure how to keep her distracted from that thought. Claire Bennet is the mother of all conspiracy theories. She's got to be Richard Belzer's wet dream. 

That came out so wrong. You know what I mean.

The whole deal was really boring. Some chick got Carrie'd (covered in blood, not the other kind), and Claire tackled me to knock me out of the way of some flying meat hook (being tackled by a girl is fun and all, but hitting concrete is never a good time). The happy funtimes kind of ended when I was nearly strangled, though.

Not my idea of a good time! Can't... breathe!

Now, when I say that Becky's an invisible, deadly evil, I don't mean she's a ninja. No matter how hard she was trying to look like one. No, she's all wishing she were Claude Rains or something.

Outta sight!

Apparently, Becky Taylor was pulling the strings on our little night of mayhem. And trying to kill me! Didn't I tell you that girl was evil? I told you she was totally evil. I think trying to kill me qualifies as totally evil, and also means I was right. Never mind the fact that she went Vlad the Impaler on poor Claire. That top is so ruined. She got away, though. Becky. But Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Ditz kind of had to see me take Claire off the pike, so to speak. I'm not sure what we're going to do about that. The one girl might just keep quiet because she knows no one would believe her, but blondie? I get the feeling she'll tell anyone who listens what she saw. Now, if it were just me, I'd be okay with just telling people to bite me if they tried to bug me about it, but Claire... She wants a normal life.

She says it's okay, though.

"Like, omigosh! I've got this totally under control! I just need some wind chimes."

Claire says she knows this guy from like the Dominican Republic or something?

Beauty is Pain

"Just go in, talk to him, sign him out. He's got nobody," Bennet said, while staring at my chest. "You've been there."

"No, I haven't, and you're never going there," I said, chastely.

I know, it's not what you'd expect to hear from me. The Tracy of old would have let him go there, and deeper, but no longer. Now, after my encounter with Dirty Old Man Malden, I've actually been considering... saving myself for the right person.

There. I said it. O Saint Fukelliakelle, patron saint of those who sleep around, forgive me!

As it turned out, though, Bennet wasn't there only to get into my pants. He needed my help to save some kid named Jeremy, whose powers had resulted in the deaths of his parents, several innocent animals, and, apparently, his skin care regime.


When I saw his face, and heard his story, my heart went out to him. Here was someone just like me, someone in danger of letting great destructive power get in the way of really great looks. Out here in Hicksville, Wherever, he had the potential to be a real gem, someone I would let my hypothetical plain but overachieving daughter go out with in an attempt to make her prettier by association and thus make her worthy of my name, but now, with this disaster, he just looked so dreadfully... ugly.

Bennet was right. I'd been there, too. Except that when I murdered a man, rather than let myself fall into squalor, I made the right choice and slept with Senator Petrelli while he was still worth sleeping with. But if it hadn't been for that one decision, I could've wound up riddled with guilt and acne, just like Jeremy.

There, but for the grace of Saint Fukelliakelle, went I.



From there, we started making plans. Bennet and I would adopt Jeremy, and we would pretend to be a formerly loving couple that had divorced on the grounds of irreconcilable ugliness. Jeremy would live with Bennet and mope about like a stereotypically banal yet secretly repressed teenager, I would come over for weekend power practice and softball games, plus heavily inappropriate makeout sessions with my "ex-husband," and we would all get rich off the sitcom earnings.

It all would have been perfect, if Jeremy hadn't gone and killed someone else, splattering noseblood all over us in the process.


In a flash, I realized what a fool I'd been. Bennet and Jeremy didn't understand what it was to be beautiful, not really. For them it was all about murder and testosterone and trying to evade the law and "live normal lives" and whatnot.

Sorry honey, Beauty Goddess Tracy Strauss won't play that game anymore.

"We could've saved him," Bennet told me, after the fashion police had rounded up Jeremy.

"Why should I, Neville?" I asked, proud of myself that I'd remembered his first name, despite his unattractiveness. "You ever think the beautiful people could just... be beautiful? Out in the open?"

"After today, no," he said, continuing to stare at my chest.

I glared. "Don't ever call me again," I said, and drove away, leaving him stranded in Hicksville, Wherever.

From now on, I would look for people who understood me, people who were beautiful... maybe even a community of beautiful people? There I would become queen and all would be well. I would find what I've been looking for.

Maybe even that special someone I'm saving myself for.

I'm coming for you, hot stuff.

XOXO,
Tracy

jjjjjjjjjjjHwhatt? Drrukn bolgging!!

Graet nwes! Imm durnk! Wiat...taht's not teh graet nwes. Ist thhe goood newess buts theers bettrer newws. Graeet newes! I jsust gott to remeeber waht itt iis. Hoo ya! Teh graaeet nwes is taht Im klilingg Slyarr!

OMG! No, your not! Im like rite here!

Go waay! Sputid Slyar tyring to ttkae overr my bolg. Tish is my bolg not Slyar'ss bolg. I jsut need mroee acholollll!!!!!

Like stop it! Your hurting me!

Oen moree shto shuldds do it.....

I'm melting! I'm melting!!



Yess!! Fnilally! Hes ggnoe. At fristt yuo knwos he wastnt taht bad of a gyu ralelly. I maenn it wass kdnida nice hvasing a feriend to shaare my daaay whitt. Btut tehns he tokoo it too frarr!

"Yuuor a dylsesicx losrre!" ehh wuold tuants me. "Gvie me bck myy bdoy!"

Btut tath didnt get to mee.

"Yuuor a faat losrer!" hee wuld tuant me. "Gviae me bacck my boddy!"

I wsas useed to itt.

"Yuoor a sutpids losre!" he wuodl tuntt mee. "Giev mee baack mmy bdoyy!"

I swas udsed too taht onne tto!

Btut ehent he weent and ddi smoethingg I wsant at all useed to! Hee gavs myy wfie an orgamss!



"OHhf Mattt! Wwhy cannt yuuo bee lkei tahtt alll tthe tmiee?" Jjancie askked acrdodingg to Slyyar.

Weell duhh! Theer arre pulicb deccency lwas, tathss why.

Bttu Jacine doseent havee tow orry abbouttt tahtt anmyoree. Tehere wnot bee anyy moree seex beecusee I fuondd a curee for myy Slyar prolbeem! Itss onne teqila, too tequilla, trhee teequila....

It Can't Be True!

So, inside this house of mirrors thing, I was shown information about my past. It was a horrific sight! There were murders, brain feasts and more murders. But the worst part was when I saw an old blog post that I wrote.

"NoOocoOoOOoOOoO!!!!" I screamed. The grammar was atrocious, but the thing that was really too much was seeing myself in a dress. My stomach churned as I ran outside of the reflection maze.

"What a wuss," the speedy fellow with the knives commented. I'm not sure how I could hear him from so far away.

As I stared down at the puddle of my vomit, I couldn't help but feel something was missing. Brain chunks? What? I needed to find out who I am, and that search led me here, to the Burnt Toast Diner.

"So, that explains it," I said, "I'm a blogger. Now I see why I have no family or friends, but that doesn't explain why I'm a murderer."

I decided I should travel down to Midland, TX and visit the Burnt Toast Diner. Perhaps there would be clues there. But Samuel stopped me.

"Thinkin' 'bout leavin'?" he asked. "Once a carnie, always a carnie. That's part o' the Carnie Code."

Well, he had me there. So, I decided at the very least to postpone my trip to Texas. Besides, what little memory I had told me it was a terrible place. I had the strangest feeling that only two things came from Texas, and I was pretty sure I wasn't a steer.



"I hope I'm not from Texas," I sighed.

"Don't we all, brother," Samuel replied.

With the help of the Internet, I was able to find this website and log in to my Blogger account. Or at least what I think is my Blogger account. My password was "aikenrox69!"

"Can it be?" I asked the all-knowing carnie ringleader. "Is this really my Blogger profile?"

"Yes," Samuel answered me, hopping down from the human cannonball cannon. He strode toward me and continued, "you are Sexy Sylar."

"No," I resisted, "That's not true. That's impossible!"


But there I was, in full Sexy Sylar regalia, right on the Blogger profile. It was me alright. I wonder if it's still too late to be Nathan, whoever that may be. This Sexy Sylar guy gives me the creeps.

Unhappy in the Hospital

last week, i wake up in hospital in gown that no cover rear-end so well. i hate hospital. anyhow, i see peter petrelli there. peter-san tell me i teleport-o to his apartment and pass out. destiny has been doing many odd thing. it take me to different place to fix all my mistake. at first, i think that destiny bring me to peter-san to fix problem.

“maybe, destiny has brought me to you, peter, to fix problem in your life,” i say, “and you have many problem because your family very strange. by way, how your brother, fu-rying man doing?, is your mother still being billan?”

then petrelli-san get annoyed.

“don’t be silly, hiro,” he say, “do i look like i need help? who the one sitting in hospital bed acting like they been hit over head? yes, i do many dumb thing sometime, but i fine. my brand of stupid normal, but your brand of stupid is sick stupid. we need to find you cure.”

then, he touch my hand and take my power. he try to teleport, but end up teleporting to ladies room in nearby bar. (i make same mistake once three year ago. ando-kun thought it very funny). then, peter-san come back to my room and say, “whoops, my bad,” before teleporting away again. i hear this time he end up in noah-san no bathroom. remember boy and girl, no teleport while stupid.

after peter-san leave, nurse come in. she want to poke me with needle and draw blood.

“no, i afraid of needle! please no stick me!” i tell her.

“hiro, don’t be a wuss!” she answer, “stick out arm and let me draw blood. we have to run many test to see how you doing.”

“wuss? what does wuss mean?” i ask her.

“wuss is person who afraid a lot,” she answer.

a hero must never be wuss, so i decide to give her my arm to take blood. she take many vial of blood. i swear, my nurse like vampire. maybe she no run test on blood. maybe she take it somewhere and drink.

i also get to meet peter-san no girlfriend, emma-san, while in hospital. emma-san is what some young america-jin call emo. peter-san also very emo. i think they make good match. anyhow, emma-san come in room and tell me she discover that she have ability. she deaf, but she can see sound. she not very happy with new power.

“how do i make power turn off?” she ask me. she sound like she afraid of new ability. many people afraid of new ability.

“you can’t turn off power,” i explain, “it not like light swit-chi. it part of you.”

i tempted to tell her many other people wish they have ability, but no have. she very lucky. ability is part of her so she should shut up and live with it. a hero should never be rude, so i decide not to say that. emma-san leave so i start to think of new way to help her. then, i discover that there talent show on floor for kid. i decide to do magic trick. before show, i take blanket from bed and use it as magician no cape. my gown no fit so good, and blanket cover back. i no want to give people show during magic show, ne?

magic show go very well, and emma-san start to learn that power not bad. everyone happy and applaud except for boy in back row. he keep saying, “this very stupid,” and “these magic tricks suck” during performance. he even throw spitball. why is some american teenager very obnoxious? during magic show, i decide to play “magic trick” on him. i stop time, take ipod he listening to during show, and turn volume up…all the way. he very surprised when i start time again. maybe that teach him not to be brat.

after magic show, nurse very mad.

“you keep your japanese tush in this bed,” she tell me.

then she take out needle and say, “now i give you something to calm you down.”

no no no! i no like needle!” i say, but she hold me down and give me shot.

after shot, i talk to emma-san. then i remember one person i forget to add to list. charlie-san! how can i be so stupid and forget charlie-san. i care for her very much, but she still die. emma-san give me paper and pencil. i add charlie-san to list. then, emma-san leave and shot take effect. i get sleepy. very sleepy. i sleep for many hour. when i wake up, i hear beautiful music. at first, i think that i die in sleep and go to heaven, but then i discover that it was just emma-san playing music. her music very pretty. it attract everyone on floor to room like light attract fly or sugar attract ant. maybe emma-san no ability like pied-piper, ne?

when emma-san see me, she get annoyed. tried to get me to go back to bed. instead, i decide to teleport. people at that hospital so annoying. and hospital in america so expensive. hospital also like vampire, only this time it drink money. how can america-jin put up with?

so i teleport-o back three year to see charlie-san. i wonder what she say when she see me in hospital gown. hopefully, she no think i escape from mental hospital, ne?

okay everybody! time to go save charlie-san! ja ne!

The Universe and Boys and Girls too!

Ok, so you know how nothing is EVER my fault right? Well its not my fault that both boys and girls think I'm peppy and cute. Heck, even gay boys think I'm adorable.

But my wholesome all-American vibe has taken another step! Get this. My roomie Gretchen, who is kinda weird in cute Juno kind of way... I turned her into a lesbian! Or at least bi. I know it was me because there's no way someone around me could have anything different or interesting about them. It would be an overwhelming soap opera.

Anyway, so I was all "Gretchen, you totally killed Annie! You are NOT allowed to do anything more interesting than me! Jeez, don't you know how my life works? What's your problem?"

And then she kissed me and I was all "oh,". Because there's nothing new about that. "That explains everything," I told her.

"You aren't freaked out?" She asked nervously.

"Um, no? I'm totally used to it. So hey, I'm gonna go pick up Chinese take-out or something, kay?"

So while I was walking to the on campus takeout place, I did a little bit of self-analysis. I mean I did feel kind of bad for turning Gretch into a lesbian. "But its not like its a bad thing right?" I asked myself. "Gay people are cool. I even went out with a gay guy for while... and then a straight guy. And then a nerd...

And don't forget the rapist!

And its not like I've never done any expirementing before..."

And then I got it! The universe is not about gay or bi or nerds. Its about love. You just need love, right? Yes! "LOVE MAKES THE WORLD SPIN!" I cried into the chinese take-out place. And thats when I had another epiphany. I know! I'm so on a roll right!

The cheap Chinese take-out reminded me of another person who's been down on love and smells like Chinese food.

"OMG DAD!" I shrieked as I popped into his dingy appartment. He quickly closed his laptop. Poor guy. Must be resorting to porn or something.

"Hey, Claire-Bear, what's new?"

I shrugged. "Nothin' much. Gretch might have slipped me some tongue but no big,"

"What?"

"Ok, so I know how to help you, Dad. You need to get some-"

"New guns? Cats?"

"What? No! You need some love!"

"Aw, Claire-Bear..." He wrapped me in a hug.

"Well its no secret that I love you dad, but my sexual pursuers are a bit overwhelming right now. Get it? You need some sexual healing!"

"I'm sorry, sounds like you just said the word 'sex'. I'm pretty sure I told the Haitian to wipe that from your head..."

"So can I have some quarters in exchange for that awesome advice?"

And then all of the sudden, the Universe granted me another gift. A visit from my Super-Cute-Uncle Peter!

But he didn't even look at me! He and my dad totally scampered off together to who knows where leaving me with nothing but a baggie of quarters!

Later, as I put my reallky cute panties in the dryer, I realized that I should be happy that my dad has found consolation in Super-Cute-Uncle Peter. But no, both should know that Uncle-Super-Cute-Peter belongs to me! And so does Dad! But in a totally non sexual way! "Why, Universe, why? Why are you so confusing?"

"I ask myself that every day," A very small voice said from behind.

"Oh, hi... Linus, right? What are you doing here?"

"Muggle's clothes are in the washer at home. I have to wash mine here. Anyway, I know what its like to be ignored, so if you ever want to talk sis..."

"Hold that thought I just got a text." It was a pix message from Dad. "Meet your new brother" it said.

"OMG! I've always wanted a brother! He's even kinda hot!" I cried to the laundromat. As I left with my clothes, I was hit with another epiphany. Uncle Super Cute Peter and Dad weren't doing anything sketchy behind my back! Maybe the Universe really is all about love. And everyone, boys and girls, seems to love me... and I love everyone back so... I'm the center of the universe?

All Too Normal Activity of the Invisible Man

or: Why those with overactive imaginations

should avoid the cinema

No. This is not a post by Dr. Morewordsthannecessary Suresh. It's me, Claude Rains, the Invisible Man. Wanted to post about what Tarot and I have been up to since she last posted. Like she told you lot, we hadda leave our last town thanks to Zombies. Fortunately the Puppet Master made short work of the undead infestation. We found another town, this one with no Zombies (I checked) and it had this great building with a shop and a half decent flat over it for rent. Perfect place to set up shop again. Which we did. Of course this town that we've set up shop in would have to be one of those playing that new movie Paranormal Activity. And, of course, Tarot wanted to go see it. While I don't mind movies- I get in free for obvious reasons- I was concerned about the effect this particular movie would have on Tarot. The conversation went something like this:

"C'mon I really wanna see this!" She said, pleading.

"You're gettin' your own ticket if we go." I said, a serious expression on my face.

"OK. Just promise you'll sit near me?" she replied, still pleading.

I sighed. I'd thought that refusing to sneak her in to this film would have been a deterrent. "I will but are you sure this is a good idea? Every bloody time you hear our current building settle at night you go daft on me."

"It's a movie on a subject that fascinates me."

"I had noticed. Thought you got your fix for that watchin' it on the telly."

She gave a me a look. Not a dirty look but one of those half really pleading for me to go along and totally determined to go alone if she had to looks. I knew then that Tarot was going to see the movie, regardless of what I said, and nothing short of tying her up would stop her. The thought did cross my mind, but tying up Tarot would eliminate any chance of having her attract the attention of the Carnival we both want to find, so I said, "OK, fine. I'll go with you and I'll sit with you, but you are buyin' your own ticket and don't blame me if you're too scared to sleep afterwards."

"Thanks!" She said smiling and gave me a hug which I returned awkwardly. Not really one for domestic stuff, me.

So off to the theater we went. The movie was quite good. Not gonna give you too much there. I'm no reviewer and there are plenty o' those out there, so you can read what they wrote if that's what you're lookin' for. What I will tell you is it that clarified somethin' I'd told Tarot about why the Company had me executed rather than sent to level 5 when I went rogue: people fear what they can't see. It's that simple. It was a lesson about to be reinforced unintentionally later that night.

Sometime much later, we returned to the flat we were renting over our shop. I woke up in the middle of the night and I was thirsty. I decided to get up and grab a beer from the fridge. Now I should mention, after 7+ years of bein' in hiding, and bein' on my own, I have a habit of going invisible when I wake up. I'm still workin' on trying to stay invisible when I sleep. I reckon you can't shoot someone you can't see and this had never been a problem before, even after I started travelling with Tarot. Until that night, that is. I should also point out that the building we're currently in is rather old with plenty of creaky floorboards. I had my socks on, but not my boots, and anyone in the building would have heard me walking to the kitchen, even though I was makin' an effort to be quiet. I got there and when I reached into the fridge to grab a beer I heard Tarot let out a blood curdling scream behind me. I turned round to see what had scared her and I realized that it was me, or rather the fact that Tarot had thought some unseen force had been making noise and opened the fridge. I let go of the beer and headed for Tarot to stop her screaming, taking her into invisibility as I made contact with her.

"Bloody hell, woman! It's me! I just wanted a beer for goodness sake!"

She looked relieved and stopped screaming,

though I did have my hand over her mouth as having the police show up really wouldn't do. I took my hand away when I was sure she wouldn't scream or anythin' like that.

"I'm sorry, Claude. I had this really weird dream and then I heard something while I was still half asleep and when I saw what I thought was the

fridge opening by itself..."

I shook my head. "I tried to warn you. If I'd been a demon or whatever, what would I have wanted with the fridge? I'd like to think, that if I were somethin' supernatural aimin' to scare you that I'd have been makin' a lot more noise as well."

"Yeah. As usual you're right."

"Back to bed with you. Don't need you gettin' a migraine. We both know you can't read when you get one and if you can't read we won't have any customers or any chance of gettin' the attention of the Sullivan Brothers Carnival."

Tarot went back to bed and since her room is huge (I'd taken the glorified closet- "two bed room flat" pah!) I moved my bed in there. I'm a light sleeper, and beyond the usual old building settling noises, I didn't hear anythin' strange. I know Tarot finally got some sleep, I heard her snoring, but she didn't sleep very well. If I thought I could trust him, I'd see if the Haitian was about. Tarot was barmy enough before this. The last thing I need is Tarot going insomniac, as well.