October 16, 2007

The Joys of Blunt Weapons!

Hey guyz, it's Sylar! I have a new favorite weapon type! Blunt! 'N no not the kind that would make a stoned Sylarz, silly lol. Anyways, with super mind trick out, the weapon of my mind it totally out of commission. So, I need a new favorite way to kill people! I've settled on blunt! You know, the stuff that like, is dull like a knife and chops skulls like a rock!

So I've made a list of the blunt weapons I've used and my wish list! Here it is!

Random crappy blunt weapons that I find 'n junk

Hey, I know it's not sexy, but sometime's a Sylar's gotta kill someone and he just doesn't have anything hot on hand! This has been the thing so far, but not for long! You won't be seeing coffee cups and bricks anymore! We're moving up to the following things!

Gun

Yo yo, this Sylarz'z a straight up thug, G! Lol, how do you like my gansta impression? It like, totally fooled Mr. Glasses before! Anyways, I could totally use a gun! And I mean, it's not sharp, so that makes it blunt, right? I think so lol! It does slice skulls, I think! Like a mind trick! Yay!

Sponge

OMG a sponge! A hella deadly weapon. It has the force of a two ton (but still dainty) Sylarz! I smash people in the head with them with toxic soap 'n it runs down in their mouth 'n kills them dead like an Eden in a Sylar cage lol. At least that's what I hope will happen.




Machete

The bluntest of all blunt weapons, a machete, lol! It crushes things bluntly like a hot knife through butter or something! Or is that right? Or maybe I meant it pierces and slashes things like a rock or an anvil crushes things or some junk. I don't know. I'm not gonna lie, I chose this weapon just because I thought the guy in the piccy was hot, lol.

Well, that's all for now! TTYL, guys!

3 patrons:

Heidi Petrelli said...

OMG,like your so cool Sylar! You should so join my bookclub! The ladies would love you!

Claire B said...

You think that guy is hot? Ew. My Stalker BF is hotter than him. You should eat a brain with taste in guys or something dude.

Anonymous said...

We are university professors conducting research about Heroes, and we want to hear from real fans of the show. We'll be using your information to learn more about how important fan culture is to the development of shows like Heroes. We hope to publish the results some time in the near future. Please click on the link below to take the survey.

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=iMgE_2fKs9aHZ67K5JRq7Kgw_3d_3d

Feel free to forward the above link in a separate message to other Heroes fans.

If you have any questions regarding this survey, please email Lance Porter at lporter@lsu.edu.

Thanks for your help.

 
Copyright 2007


THIS SITE IS INTENDED AS A PARODY AND IS NOT AFFILIATED WITH NBC OR HEROES IN ANY WAY. USE OF COPYRIGHTED AND TRADEMARKED IMAGES FOR THE PURPOSE OF PARODY IS ALLOWED UNDER FAIR USE.

THE AUTHOR(S) OF THIS SITE RESERVES THE RIGHT TO USE, AS CONTENT FOR THIS SITE OR AS THEY SEE FIT, ANY COMMENTS MADE ON THIS SITE, OR ANY EMAIL MESSAGE SENT TO AN AUTHOR'S EMAIL ADDRESS, WITHOUT REVEALING THE IDENTITY OF, OR REVEALING ANY PRIVATE INFORMATION BELONGING TO, THE WRITER(S) OF SUCH EMAILS OR COMMENTS. BY COMMENTING ON THIS SITE, THE COMMENTER GIVES UP ANY CLAIM TO THE COPYRIGHT OF THE COMMENT, AS WELL AS ANY CLAIM TO REVENUE SHARE GENERATED FROM ADVERTISING ON THIS SITE OR MERCHANDISE SALES.